Rule Number 66 - Put Yourself in Their Shoes
You think you know all about your partner? Well, think again! My bet is you probably do not know 100% about your partner. Similarly, your partner probably does not know 100% about you.
And it is not really a big deal to not know everything. Why so?
Well, there could be things you know which you didn't think were important to share. You could have some embarrassing incidents which you rather not tell, etc.
This being the case; do not assume you know your partner that well. Give them that benefit of doubt when they flare up or get frustrated. Take a step back and look at the situations. If they are normally calm but now got irritated, there could be a bigger reason. Find out what is the reason instead of assuming.
Put yourself in their shoes and you might see things in a different perspective,
(Reflection : Your partner isn't picking emotions out of the air at random just for fun)
Rule Number 67 - In-Laws are Part of the Package
Some couples simply think marriage is about just the 2 of them. Let me get this straight - IT IS NOT. It is about your partner and your partner's family as well AKA in-laws - parents in law; sister / brother in laws, etc
And you know what; you really cannot do much about this in-laws situations. It is a package you have to accept and deal with!
They are pretty much like your family only in this case it is unlikely you can hit out at them when you are not too happy with them!
So how then do one deal with in-laws from hell?
You do not really have to deal with them... you simply have to accept them. Smile and accept that they are an integer part of your partner's life and they probably mean a lot to him or her.
Similarly, your partner will have in-laws in terms of your parents and siblings too! And he or she has to learn to accept them too!
An important note though - whatever the situation you and your partner is in. Always make sure you stand by your partner. Do not side with your family and make him / her feel so alone!! If you truly think your family is more right, then bring it up when it is just the 2 of you.
(Reflection : It is not fair on your partner to absent yourself from such a central part of their life)
Rule Number 68 - Keep Talking
Do you talk to each other in your relationship?
At the start of the relationship, I am pretty sure you both will be engaged in conversation on end.... burning up the phone lines or chatting non-stop whenever you see each other.
How about after the relationship stabilised down or after you gotten married to each other? Do the conversation continues?
I hope the answer is yes... and by conversation we mean small chat sessions to find out how's the partner's day as well as the big issues which both partners need to be made aware of.
In your conversation, you should only focus on your thinking and your feelings and not impose that your partner must think and feel the same way. We are all human; we all think and feel rather differently.
(Reflection : When you talk you should aim to interest, entertain, inform, amuse, explain and generally sparkle)
The first 68 Rules were focus on "Rules on Finding Love" and "Relationship Rules".
For the next few Rules, we deal with "Rules for Parting"
Watch out for the sharing at the start of each new week :)